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Ten Essential Online Dating Safety Tips
- By Ezekiel Matthew
- Published 02/18/2008
- Home & Family
- Unrated
Ten Essential Online Dating Safety Tips
Your instinct is a powerful medium for knowing when something doesn't feel right. It is also a great way to measure when to move forward with someone and when to turn and run. As you read profiles, responses to emails, have phone conversations, and meet in person your instincts help to tell you if something is "right" or out of alignment. The "out of alignment" message is your cue to be careful, back off, or proceed with extreme caution. Trust your gut instinct, it's the most powerful psychological tool you have at your disposal.
2. Don't Provide
Personal Information Too Soon
Your home phone number and full name provide easy ways to track who you are and
where you live. Armed with just your home phone number, a person can easily
gain access to your income information, home address, and even learn the value
of your home. Armed with your first and last name, a person can do searches to
determine quite a bit of information on you - where you work, what you do, and
even what your home phone number is. So in the initial stages of communication,
guard your personal information. As far as phone communication, see the next
tip.
3. Use a Free Email
Account
If you decide to move your communication from the anonymous email feature
provided by the majority of online dating services then provide an email
address that isn't your regular one. Sign up for a free Yahoo!, Hotmail, or
Gmail account that you use just for online dating. Don't put your full name in the
From field - only your first name or something else. This protects you from a
person being able to search your normal email address to find out more
information about you.
4. Use a Cell Phone
or Anonymous Phone Service to Chat
When it's time to
move your communication to the next level (talking on the phone), never give
out your home phone number. Either provide a cell phone number, use Skype to
communicate, or use an anonymous phone service. It's just an added protection
barrier until you get to know the person better.
5. Beware of
Married People
It's unfortunate,
but a lot of married people do use online dating services. They'll even go as
far as to meet people. A few years ago, MSNBC reported that a study found that
up to 30% of people using online dating services are married!
6.
Look for
Questionable Characteristics in Your Communication
As you chat via email and on the phone you may be able to start to pick out
characteristics of the other person. Are they controlling? Do they seem to
anger easily? Do they avoid some of your questions? These can be questionable
characteristics that tell you it's time to move on.
7. Ask for a Recent
Photo
There's nothing
wrong in asking someone if their photos are recent. If they don't have a photo,
request a recent one. It's important for you to get a good look at the person
you may eventually meet. Plus your instincts from your communications and their
photos may provide you with valuable insight into the person. Plus, if they
tell you the photo is recent and you meet and see a major difference, then
you'll know the person lied and can cut the date short. If a person lies about
their photo or profile then that is a red flag to no longer pursue the
relationship.
8. Stick With Paid
Online Dating Services
Free online dating services provide a greater opportunity for potentially
dangerous individuals. They don't ever have to provide a credit card or other
information that identifies them. There is some truth to the saying, "you
get what you pay for".
9. Don't Get a
False Sense of Security
Some online dating services claim to offer "background checks" and
when signing up for such a service you may find it easier to let your guard
down. Don't. Laws differ from state-to-state when it comes to background checks
and there are even several states where checks can't be effectively performed.
Because of the inconsistency, criminals/wrong doers can and do get into
services that do "background checks". Never let your guard down.
10. Meet in a
Public Place for Your First Meeting
When it's time to
schedule that first exciting face-to-face meeting, arrange to meet in a public
place and provide your own transportation. Your initial meeting will tell you a
lot about the other person, including whether or not he/she lied in their
profile. Your gut instincts will kick in. Never accept an offer to be picked up
at your house. Make sure that a friend knows where you are at and who you are
with.
By following these tips, you'll help protect yourself from being an easy prey to someone who may have ulterior motives. With an average of 100+ marriages a day from online dating, you can see that the experience can be both safe and rewarding. Keep it safe!
